Sigs

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Welkom

sigsSigs (signatures/handtekeningen) zijn de vaak humoristische quotes/oneliners die mensen onderaan hun email zetten, ze worden ook wel taglines genoemd. Onderaan alle 'sigs' pagina's kun je klikken op 'next' zodat je als je dat wilt eenvoudig alle 'sigs' pagina's achter elkaar kunt lezen. De sigs die ik verzamel zijn allemaal engelstalig en veel sigs hebben iets met computers te maken. Welke sigs je leuk vindt hangt af van je gevoel voor humor en dat is bij ieder mens weer anders.
Vergeet niet om ook een berichtje achter te laten in het gastenboek:

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Sigs: L

Label
The label "new" and/or "improved" means the price went up.
Lance
When you have a thermic lance, everything looks like hours of fun.
Language(1)
A language is a dialect with an army.
Language(2)
Man invented language to satisfy his deep need to complain. -Lily Tomlin
Last(1)
He who laughs last thinks slowest.
Last(2)
He who laughs last is probably your boss.
Last(3)
Famous last words: "...Here, hold my beer... watch this..."
Last(4)
He who hesitates is last.
Last(5)
If it wasn't for the last minute, nothing would get done.
Last(6)
He who laughs last probably made a backup.
Laugh(1)
Blessed are they who can laugh at themselves, for they shall never cease to be amused.
Laugh(2)
Laugh at your problems - everyone else is!
Law(1)
It may be true that the law cannot make a man love me, but it can keep him from lynching me, and I think that's pretty important. -Martin Luther King
Law(2)
This is a court of law, young man, not a court of justice. -Justice Oliver Wendell Holmes, Jr.
Lawfully
I tried to walk a line between acting lawfully and testifying falsely, but I now realize that I did not fully accomplish that goal. -Bill Clinton
Lawn
LAWN: acronym for Local Area Weed Network.
Lawyer
A good lawyer knows the law; a great lawyer knows the judge.
Lawyers
Lawyers are the larval stage of politicians.
Leadership
Leadership is the art of getting someone else to do something you want done because he wants to do it. -Dwight D. Eisenhower
Learn(1)
For the things we have to learn before we can do them, we learn by doing them. -Aristotle
Learn(2)
If you can't learn to do something well, learn to enjoy doing it poorly.
Learn(3)
When we write programs that "learn", it turns out we do and they don't.
Learn(4)
If we learn by our mistakes, I'm getting one hell of an education!
Learning
The only thing that interferes with my learning is my education. -Albert Einstein
Least
Vote for the man who promises least, he'll be the least disappointing. -Bernard Baruch
Left(1)
If you lost your left arm, your right arm would be left.
Left(2)
I left the womb for this?
Legal
It's still legal to go .sigless.
Legless
Beware the legless man who teaches running.
Lend
If you lend someone $20, and never see that person again, it was probably worth it.
Lesbians
I always get the feeling that when lesbians look at me, they're thinking, "That's why I'm not a heterosexual." -George Costanza (Seinfeld)
Lesson
Kids, you tried your best and you failed miserably. The lesson is, never try. -Homer Simpson
Let
Let no man scrute the inscrutable nor eff the ineffable.
Letter
I have made this letter longer than usual because I lack the time to make it short. -Blaise Pascal
Letters
Letters may be used to construct words, phrases and sentences that may be deemed offensive. -Warning label on children's alphabet blocks
Liberal
A liberal is a conservative who's been arrested. A conservative is a liberal who's been mugged.
Liberty(1)
The greatest dangers to liberty lurk in insidious encroachment by men of zeal, well-meaning but without understanding. -Justice Louis D. Brandeis
Liberty(2)
They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety. -B. Franklin, 1759
Library
Your library is your paradise. -Desiderius Erasmus
License
I don't have a license to kill. I have a learner's permit.
Lie
People never lie so much as after a hunt, during a war or before an election. -Otto von Bismarck
Lies(1)
There are a lot of lies going around, and half of them are true. -Winston Churchill
Lies(2)
There are lies, damned lies and statistics. -Mark Twain
Life(1)
Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used up, totally worn out and loudly proclaiming "WOW, WHAT A RIDE"
Life(2)
Do not take life too seriously; you will never get out of it alive.
Life(3)
Life is what happens while we are making other plans.
Life(4)
Life is hard. It's even harder if you are stupid.
Life(5)
Life is short, eat dessert first.
Life(6)
If life is but a stage, I want better lighting.
Life(7)
Life is like riding a bicycle. To keep your balance you must keep moving. -Albert Einstein
Life(8)
Life is terminal.
Life(9)
Life is sexually transmitted.
Life(10)
Does life seem worthwhile to you? HERE'S HOW TO ORDER! Send $20 to...
Life(11)
Life is something to do when you can't get to sleep. -Fran Lebowitz
Life(12)
Life is ten percent what happens to you and ninety percent how you respond to it. -Lou Holtz
Life(13)
I give up, what is the meaning of life?
Life(14)
Life is just Nature's way of keeping meat fresh.
Life(15)
Life is a comedy to those who think, A tragedy to those who feel.
Life(16)
Life isn't about finding yourself. Life is about creating yourself. -George Bernard Shaw
Life(17)
Life was meant to be easy, but free will creates complicated issues.
Life(18)
There is more to life than increasing its speed. -Mohandas Gandhi
Life(19)
Life is a brief interlude between nothingness and eternity.
Life(20)
Life is a whim of several billion cells to be you for a while.
Life(21)
Life - Love it or leave it.
Life(22)
When I hear somebody sigh, "Life is hard," I am always tempted to ask, "Compared to what?" -Sydney Harris
Life(23)
Life becomes much easier once you accept you will fail.
Life(24)
Life is half spent before we know what it is. -George Herbert
Life(25)
What is important in life is life, and not the result of life. - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
Lifespan
The trouble with things that extend your lifespan is that they happen at the wrong end. I'd hate to be wearing Depends at 85 and thinking "I gave up booze and cigarettes for three more years of this."
Light
Since light travels faster than sound, people appear bright until you hear them speak.
Like(1)
I like you, but I wouldn't want to see you working with subatomic particles.
Like(2)
Take care to get what you like or you will be forced to like what you get. -George Bernard Shaw
Likely
The most likely way for the world to be destroyed, most experts agree, is by accident.
Lilo
Lilo, you've got me on my knees.
Limit
Limit Congressmen to two terms. One in office. One in jail.
Lincoln
If Lincoln was alive today, he'd roll over in his grave. -Gerald Ford
Line(1)
Art, like morality, consists in drawing the line somewhere. -Gilbert Chesterton
Line(2)
A line is a dot that went for a walk. -Paul Klee
Line(3)
That's not line noise... my modem's speaking in tongues!
Linux(1)
Linux is not a desktop OS for people whose VCRs are still flashing "12:00". -Paul Tomblin
Linux(2)
Linux: because rebooting is for adding new hardware.
Linux(3)
Linux - A most satisfying eXPerience.
Linux(4)
Linux - because a computer is a terrible thing to waste.
Linux(5)
We are Linux. Resistance is measured in Ohms.
Linux(6)
Linux is like a wigwam: no Windows, no Gates and Apache inside.
Linux(7)
Linux: the operating system with a CLUE..., Command Line User Environment.
Linux(8)
We all know Linux is great... it does infinite loops in 5 seconds. -Linus Torvalds
Liquidity
Liquidity tends to run out.
Listen
If you want your spouse to listen and pay strict attention to every word you say, talk in your sleep.
Literalists
Christian Biblical literalists are trusting themselves to an archaic English translation of a Latin translation of (help me here) Greek? Aramaic? source. I wouldn't even trust a VCR manual to make it through that intact. -Dr Dee
Live(1)
Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever. -Mohandas Ganghi
Live(2)
Live every day as if it were your last and then some day you'll be right.
Live(3)
I will live for never, or live failing.
Live(4)
May you live every day of your life. -Jonathan Swift
Live(5)
Try to live your life right to the very end.
Lives
People's whole lives do pass in front of their eyes before they die. The process is called LIVING. -Terry Pratchett
Living
As you make a living, don't forget to live.
Lizard
Off to see the Lizard? Follow the Yellow Prick Toad!
Lobotomy
Your surgeon's great! The lobotomy scars hardly show!
Logic
Does fuzzy logic tickle?
Lonely
You cannot be lonely if you like the person you're alone with. -Wayne Dyer
Long
In the long run, everybody will be dead. -J.M. Keynes
Looks
I married my wife for her looks... but not the ones she's been giving me lately!
Loop
Loop, Endless: (noun) See Endless Loop.
Loss
What looks like a loss may be the very event which is subsequently responsible for helping to produce the major achievement of your life. -Scrully D. Blotnick
Lost(1)
Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most. -O. Osbourne
Lost(2)
Some people get lost in thought because it's such unfamiliar territory.
Lost(3)
He who hesitates is not only lost, but several miles from the next freeway exit.
Lost(4)
We're lost, but we're making good time.
Lost(5)
I'm not lost, I'm directionally challenged.
Lost(6)
When all else is lost, the future still remains.
Love(1)
Love is blind but marriage is definitely an eye-opener.
Love(2)
Love is two minutes fifty-two seconds of squishing noises. -Johnny Rotten
Love(3)
There is no love sincerer than the love of food. - George Bernard Shaw
Love(4)
Immature love says: "I love you because I need you." Mature love says: "I need you because I love you." -Erich Fromm
Love(5)
A James Cagney love scene is one where he lets the other guy live. -Bob Hope
Love(6)
Eternal Love: Stevie Wonder and Ray Charles on the tennis court.
Love(7)
Love is a gross exaggeration of the difference between one person and everybody else. -George Bernard Shaw
Love(8)
Love is friendship set on fire. -Jeremy Taylor
Lovely
It was such a lovely day I thought it a pity to get up. -W. Somerset Maugham
Luck
Luck is when the paths of opportunity and preparation cross.
Lucky(1)
Feel lucky? Update your software!
Lucky(2)
Your lucky number is 3552664958674928 -- keep a lookout for it.
Lucky(3)
I thank my lucky stars I'm not superstitious.
Lunatics(1)
But there are always some lunatics about. It would be a dull world without them. -Sherlock Holmes
Lunatics(2)
All are lunatics, but he who can analyse his delusion is called a philosopher. -Ambrose Bierce
Lurk
I lurk, therefore I am.
Lying
I can tell you are lying. Your lips are moving.

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