Sigs

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sigsSigs (signatures/handtekeningen) zijn de vaak humoristische quotes/oneliners die mensen onderaan hun email zetten, ze worden ook wel taglines genoemd. Onderaan alle 'sigs' pagina's kun je klikken op 'next' zodat je als je dat wilt eenvoudig alle 'sigs' pagina's achter elkaar kunt lezen. De sigs die ik verzamel zijn allemaal engelstalig en veel sigs hebben iets met computers te maken. Welke sigs je leuk vindt hangt af van je gevoel voor humor en dat is bij ieder mens weer anders.
Vergeet niet om ook een berichtje achter te laten in het gastenboek:

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Sigs: O

Object
I object to sex on TV. I keep falling off!
Observation
The power of accurate observation is commonly called cynicism by those who have not got it. -George Bernard Shaw
Obsession
Sex: In America an obsession. In other parts of the world a fact. -Marlene Dietrich
Obsessive
There's no point in being obsessive compulsive unless you are consistent about it.
Occasional
I suffer occasional delusions of adequacy.
Offend
He who dares not offend cannot be honest. -Thomas Paine
Offenders
Stop Repeat Offenders! Don't Re-elect Them!
Office
This isn't an office. It's Hell with fluorescent lightning.
Oil
If olive oil comes from olives, where does baby oil come from?
Old(1)
The good old days: When sex was dirty & Michael Jackson was black.
Old(2)
You're only as old as you feel... the next day.
Old(3)
I'm old enough to remember when sex was dirty and the air was clean.
Old(4)
It is not how old you are, but how you are old. -Marie Dressler
Old(5)
A man's only as old as the woman he feels.
Old(6)
I don't feel old. I don't feel anything till noon. That's when it's time for my nap. -Bob Hope
Old(7)
There's one more terrifying fact about old people: I'm going to be one soon. -P.J. O'Rourke
Old(8)
There are more old drunkards than old doctors. - Benjamin Franklin
Older
Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened. -Cora Harvey Armstrong
Omelette
One can't make an omelette without breaking eggs, but it's amazing how many eggs one can break without making a decent omelette.
Omit
Omit needless, redundant, unnecessary, repetitive words.
One(1)
The ONE who knows HOW will always have a JOB; The ONE who knows WHY will always be his BOSS.
One(2)
One leader, one people signifies one master and millions of slaves. -Albert Camus
Online
ONLINE? Good! Hit <ALT-H>lt; to take the IQ test...
Only(1)
Only the wisest and stupidest of men never change. -Confucius
Only(2)
I think I'm pretty much like you, only successful.
Only(3)
This ONLY is denied God: The power to undo the past. -Ambrose Bierce
Open
Cannot open CATFOOD.CAN . Eat MS Mouse instead? (Y/N)
Operate
"We'll have to operate," the medic said cuttingly.
Operator
Operator! Give me the number for 911! -Homer Simpson
Opinion(1)
The fewer clear facts you have in support of an opinion, the stronger your emotional attachment to that opinion.
Opinion(2)
Everyone is entitled to their own opinion. It's just that yours is stupid.
Opinion(3)
Just my opinion (But I'm right).
Opinion(4)
Disclaimer: the opinions expressed in this opinion do not necessarily reflect the opinions of the highly-opinionated person expressing the opinion in the first place. So there!
Opinion(5)
If I wanted your opinion, I would have given it to you.
Opinion(6)
If I want your opinion, I'll ask you to fill out the necessary form.
Opinions(1)
My opinions might have changed, but not the fact that I am right.
Opinions(2)
I have opinions of my own, strong opinions, but I don't always agree with them. -George H.W. Bush
Opinions(3)
All opinions are not equal. Some are a very great more robust, sophisticated and well supported in logic and argument than others. -Douglas Adams
Opponent
When faced by a superior opponent, cheat.
Opportunity(1)
The pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty. -Winston Churchill
Opportunity(2)
Many an opportunity is lost because a man is out looking for four-leaf clovers.
Opportunity(3)
Opportunity always knocks at the least opportune moment.
Opportunity(4)
If opportunity came disguised as temptation, one knock would be enough.
Opportunity(5)
If opportunity doesn't knock, build a door. -Milton Berle
Opposite(1)
The opposite of a false statement is a correct statement. The opposite of a profound truth, may well be another profound truth.
Opposite(2)
If pro is the opposite of con, then isn't progress the opposite of congress. -Keith Avery
Optical
It's not an optical illusion. It just looks like one.
Optimist(1)
It is impossible for an optimist to be pleasantly surprised.
Optimist(2)
The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds. The pessimist fears this is true.
Optimist(3)
Pessimist's definition of an Optimist: Someone who knows today is so bad, tomorrow has just got to be better.
Optimist(4)
I'm an optimist, but I don't think it helps.
Organized
I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat! -Will Rogers
Orgasm
Orgasm: jumping to conclusions.
Originality(1)
Originality is the fine art of remembering what you hear but forgetting where you heard it. -Dr. Laurence J. Peter
Originality(2)
Originality is the art of concealing your sources.
Originality(3)
About the most originality that any writer can hope to achieve honestly is to steal with good judgement.
Other
On the other hand, you also have five fingers.
Out(1)
What's the point of going out? We're just going to wind up back here anyway. -Homer Simpson
Out(2)
Out of mind. Back in five minutes.
Out(3)
I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.
Outdoor
I always preferred the outdoor life...hunting...shooting...fishing...getting out there with a gun and slaughtering a few of God's creatures. -Monty Python
Outfit
That's a great outfit you're wearing . . . I have just the perfect hanger for it.
Outlook
I picked up a Magic-8-Ball the other day and it said 'Outlook not so good.' I said 'Sure, but Microsoft still ships it.'
Outside
Today I went outside. My pupils have never been tinier...
Over
It's not over until the FAT table sings.
Oversexed
Oversexed paople are just more prone...
Ovicipitum
Via ovicipitum dura est. (The way of the egghead is hard.)
Owls(1)
When it rains do owls find it too wet to woo?
Owls(2)
He who hoots with owls by night cannot soar with eagles by day.
Owned
Being owned by someone used to be called slavery. Now it's called commitment.
Oxymoron
New oxymoron: final beta.
Oysters
I will not eat oysters. I want my food dead. Not sick. Not wounded. Dead. -Woody Allen

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